Should I publish this on my blog?

It’s not depression, it’s sadness
I know by morning, I will forget
But for now, I’m pretty sure it’s sadness

Why be sad when the world’s beautiful
That’s lame, you know that, but it’s true
And it’s not depression, it’s worse than that

There’s nothing I’m searching for; zilch is what I seek
I have everything I wanted; I should be happy, but I’m not
But I know by morning, I will forget

A happy death is the one that’s sudden and unexpected
Not just for me, but for everyone I love
You shrug your shoulders, but I know you understand

What words do is the curing bit
It’s temporary, that’s okay
At least, you exist

I don’t want to die, I don’t want to live
It’s sad and amusing
But ultimately of no use

So what if this doesn’t impress you
I’m tied up, choked
I deserve a break

People talk, people plan
I, here, existing – endure
Wish it were depression, not sadness

Cheap laughs, grand plans
My life’s become what it always wanted
And yet here I am, writing about sadness

Must save the poem on my computer
All the emotion in the world doesn’t make this universe bother
Whether these words are spoken or not, it doesn’t care

Must save it once again – CTRL-S
Because I’m a paranoid
How ironic that I call myself a nihilist

I might forget all this tomorrow
But people come, people go
Stuff happens, we die – await a miracle

PS: World’s mathematical, math exists
For all that Nihilism, one laugh is enough
It’s not depression, it’s absurdity – sadness and love combined into one

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